A little behind on posting….
Jes
The view from here.
I knew that changing gears and going to working a full-time job would change things.
After everything that has changed this year….everything that has changed since about 14 months ago really…..I figured that what it would change would be pretty minor in the grand over-all of things. It is pretty hard to top some of the life changing parts on the last 14 or so months.
But even knowing all of this, even truly believing the friend that advised me, that told me this job would change things, would change how I work, (I pretty much always believe her), the thing I never thought about was ‘how’ things would change.
I have battled with much of this since I started this job. But it wasn’t until yoga class on Thursday that I think I finally realized what I needed to accept. Yeah, it is probably really cliché to have “revelations” during yoga class. Honestly, I usually don’t have them. But I think after practicing for the 8 months I have been, I am finally getting to the point of getting my brain to just shut-up-and-breath. And then as I’m leaving, the thoughts that I was able to shove off to the side for the last 90 minutes of my life, appear back again, completely sorted out, with a “yeah, this is how it will be now, so just deal with it ok?”
I wish I could say this happened all the time. But, no.
But it happened Friday.
With this job has come amazing opportunities, awesome people to work with, and thousands of stories that really are probably only funny to me, and maybe a few other people who know or can imagine the cast of characters that surround me the minute I walk in the door there. But also with it has come a new way of looking at my free time, and a new sense of what is really important.
When I wasn’t working, I was careful to not take for granted the vast amounts of time that was gifted to me, that I had to work on my artwork, to spend with friends and family, to just be. I created a lot during that time, and I have no regrets.
Now that I am working, that time is precious. And I am quickly learning what parts are important to me to continue working on…and what parts I am ok with giving up on. I have felt crazed the last few weeks trying to settle into a new job and finishing up jobs I committed to before I got this job….and while I am proud and grateful for every opportunity I have had up until now, and happy to do that work….I’m also honestly looking forward to having a break from it.
And while I realize that there are going to be moments….many moments….when it will be hard….extremely hard in some cases….but there are things and people who I have to say “no, I can’t do that job anymore” to. And I can’t even pretend that is going to be easy….but I have to. And I want to. As hard as some of these changes have been, I have realized that subconsciously, I was ready for it. I was ready to focus on one thing, plus my artwork (which is second nature to me…something I have to do…and something that is changing as well with all of this….) and most of all, taking time to stop working and be with John. It makes me sad to admit it, but in 12 years of being married to this awesome person, I never always stopped working to just be with him. Yes, I would sometimes, but not enough.
So, there have been a lot of changes around here. And there will be a lot more. And you will probably little by little notice those changes and shifts around this little website. But, for once, I at least feel like I can walk with those changes in peace, instead of always feeling like I have to fight against them.
Little updates
It has been a little quiet around my blog since I finished the last major run of printing on my book. It has been nice to have just a short break.
Of course I have been working on other little things after the printing was complete on my book. I am in a great workshop at MCBA, learning about photopolymer photograveur from Paulette Meyers Rich – an amazing artist and person. The class is full of great, creative people, and I am so excited to learn more about this medium and technique. I would really like to create more of my work in this way. And considering that my new job will allow me some extra funds to pay for the supplies needed for this medium, I’m certain I will continue with it in some form.
Yes, I said that. I have a new job. I start in just under 1 week as one of the studio managers at Anoka Ramsey Community College. It will be great!
Of course this means a lot of changes in my life in the upcoming years…as if there haven’t been many changes already. I think the hardest so far is having to step back from all the free-lance jobs I usually take on without really thinking. Time will be much more precious now.
And of course I will still be trying to finish this little book! I spent a lot of time at MCBA yesterday, and managed to get the pages organized, sorted, and the edges trimmed.
I still plan on working on this book as often as I can. Though my progress on it will slow down considerably. The work I completed yesterday was amazing to finish. Those steps were the last that needed to be completed at MCBA, and represent one more massive step complete in this book’s process. The rest I can complete on my own, wherever I need to be.
Today is the first Wednesday this summer that I haven’t been volunteering at the library. First up today is working on pottery with my dad. There is also a photo job scheduled later today, other little errands, and some work on weekend plans. But the sun is out, and I think today will be a good day.
Prints 16 & 17
On Friday I printed the map.
The map shows up on every page of this little book.
I somehow managed to mix the perfect shade of light grey ink.
Today I printed the title page and colophon. That took four runs, and four shades of blue ink. Somehow I only managed to photograph three, but you get the idea.
This little book is far from done. Next comes binding and making covers. But I am so excited to be this far, to do my last press run today.
Prints 15
Today was a massive day of printing. I finished 6 runs…and the end of the hashtag words in the book. Still to come is the map, title page, and colophon, but this, today, was a huge accomplishment.
I also started a new class at MCBA tonight, that is so amazing, it deserves way more than just a little mention here. Much more to come on that.
Tomorrow begins the month of August, typically true summer weather, and a new journal challenge I decided to try participating in. I am trying to squeeze every creative moment I can out of this summer. It some how never feels like enough though….. I am still working that out.